Fair Isn’t Always Fair
Growing up, I heard my Israeli cousins say, “Zeh loh fher!” English translation: “It’s not fair!” The first two words are in Hebrew, the last is in English, they just say it with a different accent than we do.
I always thought it was funny… why couldn’t they just use a word in Hebrew? It did, though, teach me how powerful the word is, and how hung up we are on fairness — the idea of whether something is fair or not.
Last night, was spent in a small courtroom in our town fighting a ticket that wasn’t fair. I renewed my registration, paid for it online, but the new registration got here a day after I was issued the ticket (which was issued a day after the first registration expired).
I brought my paperwork in to show the judge, sure he would dismiss it. I gave it five days to get here, and I thought it would. His answer was, “You should send it in a month in advance.”
We sat in that courtroom for an hour and a half, and returning for a trial wasn’t an option…so I took the guilty plea and have to send in the check.
They say the lessons you remember are the ones you learn the hard way…
There were scads of people who did much worse things in there than I did (in my eyes nothing, in his eyes procrastinated), and they were let off, or their fees reduced substantially. And honestly, it seemed like a lot of it was subjective… based on whom he deemed could pay the fine and who had a harder time with paying… I realize now that I was judged the second I got up there… and once I opened my mouth, no matter what came out of it, I was going to have to pay the ticket.
So, is it fair?
Not so much…
But honestly, sometimes life isn’t… and unfortunately, sometimes we’re going to be put in a position where others judge us, or our work, in ways that seem harsh or unfair. And sometimes, no matter how good an argument you make, it is what it is…
It’s a harsh reality, to be sure, but it’s only my reaction that I can control…and it’s in this fact that I can find my own power in what seems like a powerless situation.
–Sue
Add comment April 28th, 2010
